You ever tell your friend or family member the same thing over and over again to motivate them and they ignore you….. Then one day come home and say, “OMG, so and so told me blah blah blah and it was SO motivating!!!”
(insert big eyed emoji here)
And you find yourself staring at them practically yelling, “THAT’S WHAT I HAVE BEEN TELLING YOU!!!!!” And you feel totally useless and ignored……
Ya well…it happens to the best of us.
The last 24 hours has been an awakening for me. For the last few years, I’ve been slowly gaining back the weight that I lost and it’s been no surprise to me that it’s been happening. But, I did little to stop it. Kept buying bigger clothes one item at a time and my room has become a virtual “watch me grow” closet……
Facing the fact that I have a wedding to shoot this weekend and I have nothing to wear, I decided to finally bite the bullet and realize ,”I’m THIS SIZE!”. I can’t hide and and there isn’t enough spandex to deal with it! I need “real people” clothes.
So, I did the walk of shame, trying not to cry to the big girl store and see what I could come up with. I met the most WONDERFUL woman there who was so sweet and so encouraging. I left with a good number of “happy outfits” that made me feel good! For the first time in a while, I literally felt like I accepted myself!! And it was awesome!!!
I’m not saying that I want to stay this size, but I HAVE to come to terms with the fact that I’m doing little to NOTHING about it, and it is what it is!
THAT SAID…. I got a text from a friend who is my little cheerleader of late who sent me a quick reminder about taking my shakes (which frankly, I had gotten away from, because someone brought donuts into the house).
So this morning, I decided to get back to my shakes (*which I actually do enjoy because they make me feel better!) and take the dog for a walk. Not a 5 minute, “There I did it” walk, but a “I’m going at least 30” kind of walk – giving myself persmission to accept that at least I’m moving!
But somehow, on my walk today, my niece (who actually lives in Norway who’s an athlete) popped into my head. While here visiting, we went to the gym. I did the treadmill at a palsy pace, while she did intervals just two treadmills down. She’d walk….then run full out for a few minutes and repeat. When we were done, I looked at her dripping sweat looking exhausted and she uttered these words (scuse the language). “Man, that was fucking hell, but I feel SO good now that I accomplished that!!!”
………… QUOI?
Funny thing is, I do know this! I have been there, I used to train 5 days a week and be about 50lbs lighter than I am now. But I have gotten so far away from that, I looked at her like she had antenna coming out of her head.
Today when I was doing my 30, I heard those words again, and actually started jogging. It wasn’t fucking hell…it actually felt good. And I realized I had put myself in such a lazy comfort zone that I became complacent!
So, with that, and the sweet texts from my cheerleader, I am going to take a few steps a day to a better me. As I write, I’m dripping sweat from my chin and I’m feeling pretty good! I have a lot of work to do today and I’m feeling quite confident!
So, when you think of motivation, the bottom line is this…..it doesn’t matter WHERE it comes from and it may be the most random of words or random of moments….but if it’s motivation and it puts you in a better frame of mind, then just go with it! And be a pal….and pass it on!!!
Happy Thursday!
Mom of two grown ass girls and married to a short guy who is funny and cooks really well! I’m a photographer by trade, so you can say I’m a bit “peopley”. My favorite sessions are the one on ones where I just get to chat and find out about my clients. I’m blessed with what I get to do every day! Blessed by the support of my husband and kids, and blessed by the ongoing support and encouragement of my friends who are always lifting me up.