Today I was talking to my brother and he was unaware that my daughter (his niece) was home from college… indefinitely. I said, “How could you not know? I posted on Facebook”… there was silence…then fumbled words….then a precursor and then the truth…. “I unfollowed you on FB because you post so much. More than ANYONE I know!” Then he kind of almost tried to apologize but not really…
Not sure what he was expecting me to say, but I’m not stupid, so I just shrugged my shoulders and said, “Okay. Fine by me!” ….because I don’t care. And I totally get it.
When people ask to friend me on FB I tell them, “You may regret it, but okay!”. Because I.DO.POST.EVERY.THING! EVERYTHING. My kids friends tell their parents, “I’m glad you don’t post my life like she posts her kids lives!” (Yes, the parents tell me this).
And I don’t care.
The truth is, I’m not asking anyone to like me, become obsessed with me, or love everything I post. Believe it or not, Facebook to me is very much my memory. My sad pathetic memory that is very weak. I remember NOTHING… ask my husband.
I’m a stream of consciousness person. I have thoughts running through my head all the time, so in truth, I don’t really post EVERYTHING. But I do post a lot. If I offend or bother you, I’m sorry. It’s not my intention. But the beautiful thing is…you can hide me, unfollow me or even unfriend me.
I won’t take it personally.
But I will tell you what I have gained from it all. I HAVE gained friendships, and I have gained the trust of many, because at the end of the day, I have nothing to hide, and people know it. And I HAVE found that there aren’t that many people like me. I’m an open book and I will tell you when life is great, and when it totally sucks.
What happens when I spill the beans is I create a safe place for people to quietly say, “Me too” when my kids are giving me a headache, or something else unsettling happens in my day. I can’t tell you how many times I hear parents say, “I just wish my kids were as good as everyone else’s kids”. I’m not kidding. There are so many parents who think they are the only ones dealing with issues with their kids. BECAUSE NO ONE SHARES THE TRUTH! And I get it. Some things kids (teenagers) do can be embarrassing. And I don’t share every single thing about my kids on FB, but if someone needs guidance and asks me, yes I will share with them. Because I want people to know WE ARE NEVER ALONE!!! My kids realize they take the hit at times, but they have also seen the bigger picture in life, so they let me go forward with grace.
I think one thing I find most interesting in the human race is that so many people feel they are the inventor of the horrible feelings they are feeling. Like no one has EVER walked in their shoes before. And nothing could be further from the truth.
I’m thankful to have been raised by a dad who let shit fly and didn’t hold back. He was one of the most genuine human beings I knew and I feel very much a part of who he was (although he was WAY smarter and WAY more skilled on so many levels). He taught me there is no shame in how you feel. You may get your butt whooped for doing wrong, but he always discussed the wrongdoing and let me know the better way to go about things in the future. And because of him, I share how I feel…
The truth is, YES…I’m an over poster. And I actually didn’t post something I wanted to post today because for a hot second, my brother got under my skin. But the truth is, if someone doesn’t like what they see, they can keep scrolling, or hide me and not tell me (or tell me as it were), because I don’t care and I totally get it.
But I won’t stop spouting my stuff and I won’t stop being an open book for people. I don’t want ANYONE to feel like they are alone in this world because they aren’t! We all need each other at some point and I hope that people realize life is a marathon and not a sprint. Just as we tackle one part of our lives, we are struck with something else. Could be good, could be bad.
But in any case, I can’t make apologies for who I am or what I do. You can’t control me, but you can hide me and make me go away at any time. My name is Cathy … and I’m an over poster!!!